Before the Shenanigans
by Nehh Loves You
Summary: Installment three of the Shenanigans Series. Prequel to "The Various Shenanigans of Karakura High School." RenIchi, turning into GrimmIchi. T for my potty mouth and suggestions of sex. AU. Done!
1. First Day of School

Author's Note: Hiya, dear reader. This is my way of compromising. I can't think of what to do for the next chapter of Various Shenanigans, but y'all don't want me to stop writing, so I started a prequel. Enjoy and Review. Please.

Pairings: Ichigo x Renji, Ulquiorra x Grimmjow

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. Boo

Warning: MxM, filthy language (looks at Grimmjow), cheating, lying, stealing... wait, no stealing, bad writing (sorry), OOCness, typos, rambling, violence if you're a wimp, suggestion of sex, boy kissing. Don't like, don't read.

'Thoughts'

-- Scene/Time change

* * *

"Ey, Renji." Ichigo tugged softly on Renji's pony tail.

Renji turned around and playfully punched Ichigo on the arm. "How was your first day as a sophomore?"

Ichigo shrugged his shoulders. "Not really that much better than being a freshman, "What d'ya think about the teachers?"

"Soi Fon is a hard-ass, Shunsui will not teach us a damn thing, Ukitake was fairly normal, I had a substitute in band..." Renji took a deep breath. "We all know your father is a weirdo, Kurotsuchi should be in an institution, and Shiba wants us to call him Kaien." He rolled his eyes. "He's just trying to get all buddy-buddy with us."

"That was in perfect order. You already memorized your schedule?" Ichigo raised and eyebrow.

Renji nodded. "Our teachers this year are very hard to forget."

"That's for sure." Ichigo paused. "You have P.E. _first period_? That blows."

"Eh. I've got five of my classes with you." Renji smiled. "I'll get over it."

Ichigo kissed Renji. "You're so cute."

--

Grimmjow smacked Gin in the back of the head. "Ulquiorra just doesn't like you. Try being less of an asshole to him. Might be just me, but I don't like it when people treat me the way you treat Ulquiorra."

"He treated me like crap firs'." Gin rubbed the spot where Grimmjow had hit him. "He walks around with his nose in the air, and he talks to me like I'm so beneath 'im."

Grimmjow rolled his eyes. "He doesn't... Okay, maybe he does act like that, but it's just 'cause he's insecure with himself. Ulquiorra thinks no one will like him. He also thinks he's a loser, so he projects that onto other people."

"Uh-huh. And that makes people like 'im more?"

"It makes him feel better about himself. I'm not saying what he does is right, but you are definitely not helping the situation." Grimmjow sighed. "I have a hard enough time getting him to open up when he's just with me. There's no way I can get him to let loose around other people when you're there being a dickhead."

"Huh. Aizen can get Ulquiorra to be himself by just bein' there. Sounds like you got some _competition_."  
"Naw." Grimmjow shook his head. "Ulquiorra wouldn't leave me for Aizen."

"Oh? No 'sama' on that?" Gin shook his finger at Grimmjow. "Shame. Very ballsy, though." He paused. "You actually think he wouldn't leave you for Aizen? I've got news for ya, pal. Ulquiorra would leave you for a monthly 15 cent paycheck singing karaoke at a strip club."

--

"Ulquie! I missed you." Grimmjow kissed Ulquiorra on the cheek.

Ulquiorra rolled his eyes, but a rare smile was almost visible. "You just saw me two hours ago in History."

Grimmjow kissed Ulquiorra's other cheek. "I know. Two hours is _such_ a long time." He grinned. "I honestly don't know how I managed."

Ulquiorra shook his head and pulled Grimmjow into his house. "Why did you come now? It's late, and the sun's going to set soon. Are you going to walk home in the dark or stay over here?" He paused. "Again."

"Aw. Ulquie, you act like you don't want me over here." Grimmjow reached behind him for the door handle. "If you want me to leave, I'll leave."

"Grimmjow..." Ulquiorra sighed. "I just would like a little warning when you're going to stay. Try calling me beforehand. It's called 'making plans.'"

Grimmjow gasped theatrically. "Making plans? Wherever did you get _that_ idea?" He stuck his tongue out. "I was busy up until now. I don't have my cell so I couldn't call. And I _never_ think about what I'm going to do before I do it. That would make sense."

"Next time, could you please call? It's not that I don't want you here. I'd just like a little bit of time to clean." Ulquiorra gestured towards the living room. "My apartment is a mess."

Grimmjow leaned around Ulquiorra to look where he was pointing. "Your apartment is ten times cleaner than my house has ever been. Ever."

Ulquiorra smiled, finally giving in. "I've noticed."


	2. Sudden Death Mode

Author's Note: Hiya, dear reader. I like this chapter. It might be totally pointless, but I mean... Yeah. Gin is amusing to write.

Pairings: Ichigo x Renji, Ulquiorra x Grimmjow, Aizen x Gin?, Ulquiorra x Aizen (ish + one-sided)

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. Boo

Warning: MxM, filthy language, cheating, lying, stealing... wait, no stealing, bad writing, typos, OOCness, rambling, violence if you're a wimp, suggestions of sex, boy kissing. Don't like, don't read.

'Thoughts'

-- Scene/Time change

* * *

Ichigo stared at his new history teacher in shock. He was not alone; most of his classmates had a similar stunned rabbit look, but with good reason. They had just been told that Kaien-sensei had died in a car crash that morning, and the man that stood in front of them would be the replacement. Now, most of the class was either stunned that their teacher (whom they had only known for a week) had died or by the new teacher's good looks. Ichigo, however, was caught off guard by his name. He was the only one to notice, but this man shared a last name with the new student. Byakuya Kuchiki stood at the head of the class, and Rukia Kuchiki sat in the back.

--

"It's kind of creepy when you think about it." Ichigo took a bite of the apple he was holding. "I mean, do you think she's his daughter or something?"

Renji shook his head. "No way. He looked too young to have a kid our age. It's pro'lly just a coincidence."

"Dude, haven't you ever seen those cop shows? The always say, 'There's no such thing as coincidences.'" Ichigo furrowed his eyebrows. "They have to be related somehow. They both have the same last name and came to school on the same day. If that doesn't scream 'We are family', I don't know what does."

Renji rolled his eyes. "Maybe them actually admitting that?"

"Well, yeah, but that would be boring."

"You're lucky you're so cute. I'm _this close_" Renji demonstrated with his fingers exactly how close he was. "to strangling you."

Ichigo jutted out his lower lip. "Aw. I'm just curious. You don't have to be so mean about it."

"Ah! The pout! You know I can't resist the pout." Renji pulled Ichigo close and kissed him. "I apologize if I offended."

Ichigo smiled and kissed Renji back. "You didn't."

--

"Ulquiorra."

"Yes, Aizen-sama?"

"Why are you here?"

Ulquiorra blushed very vividly, his pale skin doing nothing to hide the pink tint. "I was lonely."

Aizen raised an eyebrow. "And you came here because?"

"I—" Ulquiorra looked at the floor. "I don't know."

"Well, get the fuck out, ya loser." Gin popped his head into the living room; he had obviously been listening to the conversation.

Ulquiorra looked quite insulted, but he did not dare say a word to Gin in front of Aizen.

"Gin, I believe I asked you to wait in the kitchen." Aizen glared at Gin.

"I heard ya loud an' clear, Sousuke. I juss wanted to get rid o' the problem a li'l faster." Gin looked at Ulquiorra. "I tho' I told ya to beat it."

"Gin," Aizen warned.

Gin sighed, his smile never leaving his face. "All righ'. I'm goin'." He went back into the kitchen.

Aizen returned his gaze to Ulquiorra. "However rudely he may have said it, Gin is still right. Would you please leave, Ulquiorra?"

"Yes, Aizen-sama. Gladly."

--

"What? Why would Ulquiorra go to Aizen's place?" Grimmjow looked around his painfully empty house.

"I 'unno." Gin's voice rang out from the speaker on Grimmjow's phone. "He said he was lonely."

"So he went to Aizen?"

"Yup. He said he didn' know why. Looked dead sad when Sousuke told 'im to leave."

"No... He wouldn't go to Aizen. He'd come to me..." Grimmjow paused. "You're just fucking with me."

"Believe me, I wish I coulda came up wi' this. An' I wasn' exactly pleased to see Ulquiorra—" Gin stopped, and Grimmjow could hear Aizen's voice in the background. "I'm talkin' to my bestest bud, Grimm. No! I would never tell him 'bout the Ulquiorra incident. You must think I'm a total a-hole." Aizen's voice became louder. "Uh, Grimmy, ol' pal, I gotta go. Now." The line went dead.

Grimmjow sat on his bed, staring at a wall. He lay back and drifted into a fitful sleep filled with dreams of Ulquiorra and Aizen all over each other.


	3. This Is Called the In Your Face Dance

Author's Note: Hiya, dear reader. I honestly have no idea what it going on right up in here (bahaha). If anybody has ANY suggestions whatsoever about how to continue this, I would really appreciate it if you reviewed and told me. Or emailed it to me. IMed it. PMed it. Dun care. Just get it to me somehow, some way. Because I'm totally clueless.

P.S. Scooted is a funny word, "Grimmjow's grin grew" is fun to say, and it was extremely satisfying to call Szayel "Pinky".

Pairings: Ichigo x Renji, Grimmjow x Ulquiorra, Ulquiorra x Aizen (ish one-sided), Gin x Aizen (They like each other, but they are unaware of it)

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. Boo

Warning: MxM, filthy language, cheating, lying, stealing... wait, no stealing, bad writing, typos, OOCness, rambling, violence if you're a wimp, suggestions of sex, boy kissing. Don't like, don't read.

'Thoughts'

-- Scene/Time change

* * *

"I'm gonna go ask her."

Renji grabbed Ichigo's arm. "Don't. That's so _incredibly_ nosy it's not even funny."

"So?"

"So that's really rude."

Ichigo rolled his eyes. "I want to know, so I'm gonna go ask her."

Renji started to protest, but Ichigo had already walked away.

"Ey, Rukia." Ichigo leaned against the wall next to where she was standing. He looked at the bag she was holding. A giant rabbit.

Rukia looked up at Ichigo and smiled. "Hi... Ichigo?" She seemed unsure.

"That's me." Ichigo watched the doubt on her melt fade away. "Uh, I was just wondering whether or not you're related to our history teacher."

Rukia nodded. "Byakuya is my older brother. We moved here for him to be a teacher's assistant, but the job opened up, and he took it."

"I knew it." Ichigo turned and left, but he called out over his shoulder. "Thanks, Rukia." Ichigo walked up to Renji and stuck his tongue out. "I was right, and you were wrong. I was right, and you were wrong," he sung.

Renji waved Ichigo away. "Alright, already. I get it. You don't have to rub it in my face."

Ichigo's smile grew. "Oh, but I do. She was happy to answer my question without looking the least bit offended. So there, hah."

--

Grimmjow watched Ulquiorra, who was listening attentively to Aizen. Aizen was telling some stupid story that was completely pointless, but Ulquiorra could not have looked more interested.

"... don't you think, Ulquiorra?" Aizen smiled at Ulquiorra, who didn't miss a beat.

"Oh, yes, Aizen-sama." Ulquiorra nodded like a bobble-head doll.

Grimmjow rolled his eyes. 'Aizen-sama?' he thought. 'Gimmie a break.' Ulquiorra was practically drooling over Aizen. 'God, he's got my boyfriend acting like his own personal bitch. I bet he does it on purpose, too.' Grimmjow decided to save Ulquiorra from further embarrassment. He scooted closer to the other boy and wrapped an arm around his waist. He kissed the emo-tear tattoo, and Ulquiorra jumped just enough for Grimmjow to notice. "Scare ya?"

Ulquiorra turned his head toward Grimmjow. "Why would you think that?"

Grimmjow grinned. "You totally flinched."

A smile tugged at the corner of Ulquiorra's mouth, but it needed to tug a hell of a lot harder to be evident. "I do _not_ flinch."

"You so did." The grin grew.

Ulquiorra turned to the rest of the group. "Did any of you see this so-called 'flinch'?"

Aizen shook his head. Gin shrugged. Tousen sighed. Everyone else chose not to acknowledge Ulquiorra.

"Oh, please." Grimmjow turned toward Szayel. "Oi, Pinky! You're good at pickin' shit like that up. Did Ulquie flinch?"

Szayel looked at Grimmjow in mild disgust. He obviously was not pleased that the other boy was addressing him in such a manner. "In all probability, yes. He was preoccupied, and you, ah, _distracted_ him. He covered it up rather well, though. You only realized it because you were touching him." He returned to his food, which looked like it had mutated and would be the next to try to destroy the world.

Grimmjow turned back to Ulquiorra. "Haha. You can't deny that."

"Yes, I can. Watch me."

--

Grimmjow knocked on Ulquiorra's door. Again. And again. And again. He had actually called, for once, but all he could get a hold of was the machine. He decided to call again. He leaned up against the wall and pressed 2. 'Riiiing. Riiiing,' Grimmjow thought. 'Why isn't it ringing?'

"You've reached the mobile mailbox of 954-555-2390. If you would like to send a numeric page, press—" Grimmjow shut the phone. 'Why, oh why is Ulquiorra not picking up? It didn't even ring this time. Either his phone is dead, or he shut it off.' His eyes widened. 'Holy shit! He's ignoring me! He turned off his phone 'cause I kept calling.' He looked at the door. 'Did I do something wrong?' He slid down the wall. '... Did _he_ do something wrong?'

--

Ichigo opened his front door to find (of all people) Gin. He knew _of_ the guy, but he didn't know him personally. "Uh... Can I help you?"

Gin nodded. "I need you to get Ulquiorra off of Aizen."

"Mm-hm. How exactly am I going to do that?" Ichigo raised an eyebrow. "I don't know Ulquiorra or Aizen. Or you, for that matter."

"Exactly. That's why you're the perfect man for the job."


	4. Kiddie Crayons and Devious Plans

Author's Note: Hiya, dear reader. I guess I'm lucky that I managed to fight my way out of the corner I wrote myself into, 'cause none of y'all had any ideas. Honestly, only one person even reviewed. (I love you, VietShinigami. You rock my socks off (:) Anyways, I stayed up until one thirty in the morning with a notepad and a mechanical pencil just writing down anything that I thought I could use. It kind of scares me to see my thought process on paper like that. I hope no one notices that I'm crazy. Oh, and just so you know, I'm on a lack-of-sleep-induced high at the moment. It could explain everything.

Pairings: Ichigo x Renji, Grimmjow x Ulquiorra, Ulquiorra x Aizen (one-sided?)

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. Boo

Warning: MxM, filthy language, cheating, lying, stealing... wait, no stealing, bad writing, typos, OOCness, rambling, violence if you're a wimp, suggestions of sex, boy kissing. Don't like, don't read.

'Thoughts'

-- Scene/Time change

* * *

"What are you doing, Aizen-sama? Give me my phone."

"I'm freeing your mind from distraction, Ulquiorra." Aizen pressed and held the "End" button, and the phone began to shut off. "I saw you tense up every time he called. He finally managed to crack you, and you were guilt tripped into calling him back. I asked you here for a reason, and I want no less then your undivided attention." He stuffed the phone in his pocket. "I'll give it back later."

Ulquiorra nodded solemnly, not in the mood to argue. "Why _did _you ask me here?" He glanced around the pizza parlor and remembered that this was Grimmjow's favorite place to eat. A pang of remorse ghosted across his heart.

"Well, I realized you were probably uncomfortable talking to me with Gin in the house, so I asked you here to talk in private." Aizen smiled, devious plans dancing in his eyes.

"This isn't my definition of 'private'." Ulquiorra tapped his fingers on the table, a substitute for his habit of stowing his hands in his pockets.

"That's why it's brilliant." Aizen paused dramatically. "Privacy in public. No one will pay attention to the two of us having an innocent conversation in the corner of Danny's place. There's so much hustle and bustle here on Fridays that we'll be completely secluded."

"Oh." Ulquiorra found a kiddie crayon left on the table by a previous customer and started to fidget with it. It was blue. He sighed. "What did you want to talk about?"

"I wanted to know why you really came to my house Monday." Aizen glared at the crayon. "And we really needed to spend a little more time with each other, Ulquiorra."

Ulquiorra almost dropped the little blue crayon. "A— Ah." He looked around, trying to find some means of escape. He knew Aizen would just scoff if he found out about Ulquiorra's true feelings.

Aizen sat patiently, awaiting an answer. He took the green crayon and began to draw tiny hearts on the paper napkins.

Ulquiorra watched as Aizen occupied himself with the abandoned crayon. He figured there was no harm in telling Aizen about how he felt; he had a boyfriend, after all. "I went to your house to try and convince you to... be with me."

Aizen looked up from the heart-covered napkin. "I thought so. Why didn't you?"

"I realized what an idiotic idea it was after I had rung the doorbell. I couldn't leave after that." Ulquiorra was still twiddling with the crayon. "Even if I had managed to establish some form of courage, I couldn't say anything with Gin listening."

"He's very disconcerting, isn't he?"

Ulquiorra nodded.

Aizen looked at Ulquiorra warmly, a grin that told nothing plastered on his face. "I don't need any convincing. Would you leave Grimmjow for me?" As Ulquiorra blushed and stumbled over his words, Aizen knocked off an item on his mental checklist. 'Phase One: Complete.'

--

Ichigo listened to Gin without much interest. He didn't care about any of those stuck-up jerks' love lives. It was definitely dramatic to be at the top of the social ladder. He also didn't understand why Gin was so adamant that Ulquiorra get the hell away from Aizen. Gin and Aizen weren't together, and the way Gin told the story, Aizen wasn't even interested in Ulquiorra. He was going to help him anyways; there was no contact with the popular crowd at all. Just a creative assignment with a plot twist. He really didn't care about the better-than-thous, but that wasn't going to stop him from taking on the challenge their problems had created for him. He was getting a little bored with just sitting on the sofa and watching TV all day anyhow. Ichigo smirked as he escorted Gin out of his house. This was going to be fun.


	5. Cheating is Bad, Mmkaaaaay?

**Hiya, dear reader. I am so proud of how I pulled this all together when I had no idea where I was going when I started. Go me. I rock. Go me. (:**

**Pairings: Ichigo x Renji, Grimmjow x Ulquiorra**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. Boo**

_I walk around school now, and all I hear is "You cheated on me" this and "You cheated on me" that. Seriously folks, why would you cheat on your boyfriend or girlfriend? Obviously, you don't want to leave your current partner, for whatever reason that may be. Maybe you like your partner more than you like the person you're cheating with. If that's the case, __stop cheating__. Maybe you're too scared to leave your partner. Suck it up. Why stay with him or her if you don't want to?_

_Another fantastic solution to this problem is to not cheat in the first place. You like your partner and don't want that to change. Why screw up a perfectly good relationship? I don't know many people who would stay with someone whom they knew was cheating, so if they find out, you can say "buh-bye" to that picture-perfect relationship you thought you had._

_Then we have the cheatees. The infamous. The root of all problems. If you guys would just butt out, no one would be having these problems. Your crush has a boyfriend? Wait for your crush to come to her senses. If you can't wait, find a new object of your affection. Trying to seduce said crush would be a very greedy, cold-hearted thing to do. What if that girl was going out with you, and she was the one cheating. How would you feel? It's a pretty sucky feeling, isn't it? That's how her boyfriend would feel if he found out. Which could possibly be a safety hazard. Another reason why being the cheatee is a bad plan._

_What I'm trying to say here is cheating is a very widespread problem, and you can do the world a huge favor by not contributing to the already enormous portion of the population that it engulfs. _

_-Ichigo Kurosaki_

--

Ulquiorra held the school newspaper in his hand, trying to maintain the stoic façade he had to assume every day. He couldn't believe what he was reading. Sure, he'd told Aizen that he wouldn't leave Grimmjow, but that didn't stop Aizen from trying again. If the relentless kisses when no one was looking didn't stop soon, Ulquiorra doubted that he could say no to Aizen again. He blamed himself for allowing this to happen. His feelings roamed astray, and now a huge burden flung itself onto his back. As he threw the paper in the garbage, he didn't even notice when Aizen tried to woo him again. A light kiss was planted on his lips, and he just stared ahead.

Aizen chuckled to himself, glad he could find fun at eight o'clock in the morning behind the school. He waved his hands in front of Ulquiorra's face, but he acted as if he saw nothing. He wondered fleetingly if Tousen was contagious, but the color in Ulquiorra's eyes was all too evident. He scowled. It wasn't like Ulquiorra to completely ignore him. "Ulquiorra!"

The dark-haired boy snapped out of his daze. "Oh! Hello, Aizen-sama. I was just thinking about you."

Aizen beamed. "That sounds promising. I was standing here for at least five minutes before you realized. Whatever did I do that left you so deep in thought?"

"It wasn't anything you did. I was just wondering if you would relent trying to win me over." Ulquiorra sighed. "I'm not going to be enticed by your efforts, and it would convenient if you would renounce your mission to steal my heart."

"Ulquiorra, I thought you wanted to be with me." Aizen's scowl had returned. He was quite frightening when he was angry.

"I did, Aizen-sama. But I don't now." Ulquiorra's face softened just a bit. "I'm happy with Grimmjow."

"If you say so, Ulquiorra." Aizen walked away, his mind whirring. 'If Ulquiorra won't cooperate, maybe I can just lie to Gin.'

--

Ichigo looked at his handiwork in the school newspaper. Gin had just come prancing up to him, waving it about like a flag and yelling, "This is great! Perfect! Ya did it just righ'."

"You think?" Ichigo had fun writing the article, but it was assured that Ryuuken would be on his ass about it. He could hear him babbling about how he was disgracing the school and what kind of newspaper did he think this was and why didn't he run it past Ryuuken first. But if this article had done some good in the world, he could probably sit through the spheal. "It's not too obvious?"

Gin shook his head. "Ulquiorra wouldn' suspect a thing. He dunno you, so it wouldn' even occur to 'im that it was all to convenien'."

Ichigo smiled. "Figures. 'Least all my hard word wasn't for nothing. Lemme know if Ulquiorra laid off."

Gin winked (which isn't really noticeable, but he did). "Will do, pal. Will do."


	6. To Die For

Author's Note: Hiya, dear reader. I like this chapter. Kind of. It's not the best, but ya know how it goes. By the way, if anybody wants me to beta read for them, I'd be more than happy to. (: E-mail me at xxsweetestsin (at) hotmail .com  
Reviews are appreciated.

Pairings: Ichigo x Renji, Grimmjow x Ulquiorra, Renji x Byakuya (gasp)

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. Boo

Warning: MxM, filthy language, cheating, lying, stealing... wait, no stealing, bad writing, typos, OOCness, rambling, violence if you're a wimp, suggestions of sex, boy kissing. Don't like, don't read.

'Thoughts'

-- Scene/Time change

* * *

"Ulquiorra's _wha'_ now?"

"Very sweet. And his kisses are to die for."

"Uhm, Sousuke, are ya feelin' okay?"

Aizen sighed like a lovesick fangirl. "I'm feeling much better than okay, Gin, but thanks for asking."

Gin tapped his soda can, fresh out of the only machine in the whole school (Located in the teacher's lounge. One of the many perks of associating with Aizen, every teacher's favorite student, is access to most things only available to faculty). "Isn' he with Grimmy? Gosh, I can't believe he'd still cheat on him after readin' that article in the newspaper last week. Heart wrenchin' stuff, man."

"He wanted to leave Grimmjow, but I told him not to. I don't know if I really want to be with him right now, so I don't want him to have nothing if I decide to leave him."

Gin perked up. "You woul' leave him? Under wha' circumstance?"

"If I found someone else."

--

Ichigo sighed. "What the hell, Renj? You can't be failing History that badly."

"I really am, Ichi. I'm no good at it. Never have been; you know that."

"Why do you have to study with Byakuya? You should come over here. I've been told I'm a really good teacher." Ichigo winked.

Renji shook his head. "I can't, Ichi. I hafta study with Byakuya 'cause he's the one teaching the class, thus he would be the best to help me."

"Come on," Ichigo whined. "You haven't spent any time with me outside of school for a week. All you've been doing is going to those effing study sessions. If he wasn't our teacher, I'd honestly accuse you of cheating."

"You come on. You know I'd never do something like that."

"I know you wouldn't. I'm sorry. It's just... I miss you, Renj."

"I miss you, too, Ichi." Renji paused. "Tomorrow, after school, we can go get some ice cream at the mall. How's that sound?"

Ichigo smiled. "Heavenly."

--

Gin thought to himself. If he told Grimmjow about Ulquiorra and Aizen, he'd probably get on Ulquiorra's ass about it. That would make Ulquiorra feel guilty and call it off with Aizen. There's only one problem. For once, he doesn't want to be the bearer of bad news... No, can't be it. It must be because the plan could backfire. If Grimmjow dumps Ulquiorra for cheating, Ulquiorra would be free to get with Aizen, no strings attached. But he really can't see any other way to get Aizen all to himself. He picked up the phone and began to dial Grimmjow's number.

--

"Hello?" Grimmjow paused and turned to look at Ulquiorra, who was sitting on Grimmjow's bed. "Yeah, he is here, actually." He paused again. "Really? Are you sure? He wouldn't do something like that." Pause. "Aizen told you himself." He sighed. "Then it's gotta be true. He has no reason to lie." More pausing. "Mmkay. Thanks, Gin. Bye."

"What did Gin want?"

Grimmjow's eyes widened. "He, uh, wanted to tell me that Aizen... saw you skipping class today. You didn't pick up, so he called me."

Ulquiorra raised an eyebrow. "I didn't skip class today. I've never skipped class in my life."

"Eh." Grimmjow shrugged his shoulders. "Aizen should probably go back to wearing those glasses. He must be seein' things."


	7. Can You Say Oh My God?

Author's Note: Hiya, dear reader. I love this chapter. T'is coolio. And scandalous. Reviews are appreciated. (If you read it when I posted this earlier, skip down to the end. I extended it)

Pairings: Ichigo x Renji, Grimmjow x Ulquiorra, Byakuya x Renji

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. Boo

Warning: MxM, filthy language, cheating, lying, stealing... wait, no stealing, bad writing, typos, OOCness, rambling, violence if you're a wimp, suggestions of sex, boy kissing. Don't like, don't read.

'Thoughts'

-- Scene/Time change

* * *

Renji's eyes widened, feeling the vibration of his phone in his pocket. "Oh shit," he thought. "Uh, Ichi? Nature calls. I'll be right back." He left Ichigo, who looked very confused, at the table and rushed into the bathroom. He looked at his cell to find that his assumption was correct. He flipped it open and started to whisper-yell at the caller. "Byakuya! I told you I was busy today. Why the _hell_ did you call me?"

"Oh, that was today? I thought you were going on Friday."

"No. Friday I'm going home with you."

"Ah, yes. Well, I missed you. That Kurosaki boy has no right to steal our valuable time together."

Renji sighed. "He has every right. He's my boyfriend."

"Still? When are you going to get rid of him. I'm rather tired of sneaking around."

"I don't want to leave him. I'll feel horrible."

"Yet you're okay with cheating on him?"

"I might as well. He's already freaking suspicious. Did you see that article he wrote last Monday? And yesterday he almost flat out accused me."

"So it will to be surprising to him if you just let him know that it's over."

"Fine. Give me a week. I promise I'll leave him by then."

Byakuya was silent.

"Hello?"

"Alright. By this time next week, he had better be single."

--

"What, may I ask, did you get Gin to tell my boyfriend?"

Aizen raised an eyebrow. "I didn't get him to tell your boyfriend anything." He emphasized the word "boyfriend" mockingly.

"Oh, really? That's interesting." Ulquiorra's words were smothered in sarcasm. "Gin called Grimmjow last night. Grimmjow said he called about how I supposedly skipped class yesterday, and oddly enough, Gin had also said you informed him of this. Obviously, Grimmjow was lying because I did not skip class yesterday. Even if I did, the wouldn't call me, or Grimmjow for that matter. And even if they _did_ call, it would be one of those nice ladies in the front office instead of Gin. Now, I don't know what really was said to him, but Grimmjow hasn't looked me in the eye since. I'm going to ask you again: What did you get Gin to say to my boyfriend?"

"I told you, I didn't get him to say anything. I _might_ have accidentally lied to him and said we were getting it on behind Grimmjow's back, but I never told him to tell anyone." Aizen smiled. "If you had—"

Ulquiorra slapped Aizen in the face. "If you ever fuck with me or Grimmjow again, I will personally see to it that your life is ruined."

Aizen rubbed his cheek, amused. "Do you really want to be making such empty threats, Ulquiorra?"

Fire burned in Ulquiorra's eyes. "Try me, Aizen-sama. See just how empty my threats are."

--

As Gin walked past the supposed-to-be-empty history classroom, he sees something move inside. He walked closer and peered through the window. Two people were inside, one sitting on the teacher's desk, the other attached to the first at the lips. He studied the two people and found the second to be Kuchiki-sensei, the teacher whose room he was observing. It was hard to tell where one man ended and the other began until he saw a flash of red. 'Isn't he going out with Ichigo,' Gin thought. He dialed Ichigo's number. "Hey. I'm in front of Byakuya's room. Can ya meet me here?"

Two minutes later, Ichigo walked up to Gin. "Hey. What's up?"

The silver haired boy pointed at the window. "Juss returnin' the favor ya did me when ya wrote that article."

Ichigo peeked through the window and suppressed a scream. He flung the door open, marched in, and yelled, "What the _fuck_ is going on in here?!"

Renji leaned around Byakuya, eyes wide and face flushed. "This isn't what it looks like!"

"Really, Renj? Then please, enlighten me. What _is _this?" Ichigo folded his arms across his chest.

"It's, uh... Well, you see... It's a long story..."

"Lay it on me. I've got all the time in the world."

Byakuya turned around. "Renji's been with me behind your back for a while now. He was trying to figure out a way to dump you without hurting your feelings."

"Huh. That's weird, Renj. What he just said is _exactly_ what it looks like."

"Ichi... I'm really sorry."

"Don't be." Ichigo turned to leave, but he stopped and looked over his shoulder. "Oh, and consider me officially dumped."

--

Ichigo sat with Gin in the teacher's lounge. "I just can't believe he'd actually do this to me. He just told me Wednesday that he would never cheat on me. He lied to my face." He slammed his fist on the table. "I am such an idiot."

"Don' be so hard on yerself." Gin paused. "Me an' the gang are goin' to a club tonight. How's about you round up some of yer friends and meet us there? It'll get yer mind offa things."

"Why not? Don't have anything better to do."


	8. I Smell a Breakup pt 1

Author's Note: Hiya, dear reader. I love this. It is vair amusing. Reviews are appreciated.

FYI - These are the people who are at the club: Aizen, Gin, Ulquiorra, Grimmjow, Yammi, Stark, Lilinette, Szayel, Nnoitra, Halibel & Crew, Loly & Menoly, Ichigo, Rukia, Uryuu, Chad, Yumichika, Ikkaku, Rangiku, Orihime, Hanataro, Hisagi, Kira, Momo

Pairings: Grimmjow x Ulquiorra, Renji x Byakuya

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. Boo

Warning: MxM, filthy language, cheating, lying, stealing... wait, no stealing, bad writing, typos, OOCness, rambling, violence if you're a wimp, suggestions of sex, boy kissing. Don't like, don't read.

* * *

"Gin!" Rangiku smacked the silver haired boy in the back of the head. "You could have _told_ us that we were walking! I'm wearing five-hundred dollar pumps. I can't walk outside in these!"

Gin rubbed the back of his head. "Geez, babe. Ya dun hafta hit me."

"Don't call me babe when I'm mad at you."

"I dun see what yer getting' all worked up about, Ran. Why can't ya wear em' walkin'?"

"Besides the fact that these are going to get _ruined_ if they get wet or muddy, they are not shoes you want to walk in."

"Then why did ya even wear 'em?"

"Because they matched my outfit perfectly. Duh?"

"Of course." Gin paused. "Hold that thought, babe. I gotta go mingle the guests."

"I told you not to call my babe when I'm mad at you!" Rangiku called after gin. She was too late, however; Gin had already navigated his way through the house, leaving Rangiku to wonder if "mingle" can be used that way.

Gin began a hunt for the owner of the undeniably orange hair he had spotted bobbing in and out of rooms. There weren't a lot of people – thirty, tops – but that thirty was enough to slow Gin down in his search for his prey. When he finally managed to tempt conversation out of the carrot top, he had lost sight of his other victim. He then dragged the poor red head around until Gin had located a certain teal haired boy. Mischievous doings danced in his head as he "accidentally" knocked one victim into the other. Gin stealthily slipped away, blending in with the other faces as his plan began to unravel.

Grimmjow pushed Ichigo off of him, a string of very... _colorful_ words tumbling from his mouth. "Watch where you're goin', asshole."

Ichigo scrambled to his feet. "Sorry. Somebody shoved me." He reached out to help Grimmjow up, but the other boy swatted his hand away, muttering some of the ruder words in his vocabulary.

Grimmjow pulled himself to a standing position and scowled at everyone and everything in sight. He looked completely ridiculous sprawled on the floor under that buffoon, and Grimmjow did not like being mad a fool. After he gave The Look to anyone who dared to stare, his glare came back to the moron who fell on him. Grimmjow realized that the idiot had been intensely studying him since he had gotten up. "Can I help you?"

Ichigo shook his head. He had just noticed how unbelievably sexy Grimmjow was, but there wasn't a snowball's chance in hell he was going to admit that.

Grimmjow traced the familiar face with his eyes. "Do I know you from somewhere?"

"I'm Ichigo. I'm in five of your classes."

"Strawberry, eh? I'm Grimmjow."

"I know. I'm in five of your classes."

"Are you sure?"

Ichigo nodded and began to count off on his fingers. "Japanese, Geometry, Creative Writing, Technology, and History."

"Oh. That's why I didn't realize it. In those classes, I'm sleeping, skipping, daydreaming, numb to all things un-mathly, or visiting Yamamoto."

"Un-mathly?" Ichigo raised an eyebrow.

"Yeah. I really love math, especially geometry, so I just kinda—Hold on; my phone's ringing." Grimmjow pulled his cell out of his pocket, flipped it open, and pressed it to his ear. "Hullo?" He paused. "Whoa, whoa, Ulquie. Slow down." He paused again. "No... We were s'posed to meet at my house." Another pause. "Everybody's probably here already... I can just round 'em all up and herd them to the club right now." Pause. "Mmkay, Ulquie. See you soon. Bye." Grimmjow stuffed his phone back in his pocket. "Wanna help me get everybody out of my house?"

Ichigo smiled. "Sounds like fun. I haven't played traffic cop since first grade."

The two discussed strategy for a moment and then began yelling at people to "get out the effing door and start walking to the damn club." They waved their arms around and emphatically proclaimed the order again and again. Once they had successfully evacuated the house, the boys high-fived and laughed about the startled looks most people had displayed. They started after the group after several hysterical fits and bad imitations, chatting about absolutely nothing.

Gin headed the mass of people, followed closely by Rangiku, who was whining about the runs she was going to get in her stockings because she had taken off her shoes. When they arrived at the club, Gin went to stand in line, but Rangiku motioned towards the door. "I know the bouncer." She proceeded to walk on the wrong side of the velvet rope, reaching the bouncer with a skip and a smile. "Hey, Shiro-chan!"

"Matsumoto! How many times do I have to tell you? It's Hitsugaya!"


	9. I Smell a Breakup pt 2

Author's Note: Hiya, dear reader. I had bucket loads of fun writing this chapter. Honestly. (I'm going to shamelessly plug my new chapter fic. Ghastly. Check the pro. I am in love with it). I'm so excited, by the way. I ordered Uryuu's new quincy necklace, and it came today (: So cool -total dork- Oh, can anyone think of a title for this chapter? Mine sucks... Reviews are love.

Pairings: Grimmjow x Ulquiorra, Renji x Byakuya, Kira x Gin (one-sided)

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. Boo

Warning: MxM, filthy language, cheating, lying, stealing... wait, no stealing, bad writing, typos, OOCness, rambling, violence if you're a wimp, suggestions of sex, boy kissing. Don't like, don't read.

-- Scene/Time change

* * *

"Can I get you anything, Aizen-sama?"

"No, Hinamori. I'm just fine, thank you."

"Are you sure, Aizen-sama? Maybe a glass of water or a cup of coffee?"

"I said I'm fine." Aizen pushed away the various things being shoved in his face and wondered when his fangirls had picked up the title Gin had jokingly awarded him with. It was bad enough having all of student government (dubbed the "Espada" by none other than Gin) refer to him that way; he didn't need that nasty little habit to spread any further.

It wasn't supposed to leave the bedroom.

--

Grimmjow sighed. "Where the hell is Ulquiorra? I've called him a gazillion times, but he hasn't picked up once. He told me on the phone that he was here..."

"Maybe he got tired of waiting and left. You did say he was cheating on you," Kira pointed out.

"But he's cheating on me with Aizen. Aizen is here. So wouldn't it make sense that he'd want to be here?"

"Maybe his fear of you outweighed his love of Aizen."

"Yeah, but..." Grimmjow paused. "He doesn't know that I know. He has no reason to be afraid of me."

Kira raised an eyebrow. "He doesn't know that you know? Grimmjow, you have to tell him. Stand up for yourself. Hell, I'd have left him by now."

"I know I should, but I just can't bring myself to." Grimmjow sighed again. "Where'd Berry go?"

"Ichigo is... in the bathroom, I think. Somebody called him."

"Yeah, well, he'd better get his ass back here soon or—"

"Or what, Grimm?" Ichigo walked up to the bar and seated himself on the stool next to Grimmjow.

Grimmjow grinned. "Gave me a pet name already, huh?"

"Oh, you're one to talk. 'Where'd Berry go?'" Ichigo mocked.

"Shut up. That is a fully justifiable nickname."

"Uh-huh. And my aunt's the queen of England."

"God, you guys bicker like an old married couple."

Grimmjow and Ichigo turned to Kira in surprise; both had forgotten the third boy was there. "We do not!" they protested in unison. The two then turned to each other and began yelling. Snippets of "Don't say what I say" and "I said it first" could be heard, but not much, for the boys were arguing at the same time.

Kira folded his arms across his chest and smirked. "I rest my case."

--

"Gin! Let me out of here!" Ulquiorra pounded on the door of the stall in which he was being held captive.

"Can't do that, Ulquie. If I do, you're gonna go frolic wi' that boyfriend of yers, and him an' Ichi'll never get together."

"God damn it, Gin!"

"Language, Ulquie."

"When I get out of here—"

"Making threats again, Ulquiorra?" Aizen strolled into the bathroom. "You really need to stop doing that."

"Aizen-sama! I... I was just..."

"No need to explain. I'm sure you have a very valid reason for threatening Gin."

"He locked me in this stall, sent Kira to talk Grimmjow into leaving me—"

Aizen chuckled. "My, he really will do anything for you, Gin."

"'S 'cause he loves me."

"How can anyone not?"

"Aw, Aizen, yer makin' me blush."

Ulquiorra cleared his throat. "And now he's trying to set _my boyfriend_ up with someone else."

Aizen raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really? Who might that be?"

"Ichi, of course."

"Quite the little cupid, aren't you?"

"Juss doin' my part to help the world."

"How the hell is breaking up a couple 'helping the world'?" Ulquiorra yelled.

"S'not like you deserved him in the first place. Ya were cheatin' on him."

"Ah, Gin? About that..."


	10. I Smell a Breakup pt 3

Author's Note: Hiya, dear reader. I am so so so so so so so so so so beyond sorry that I haven't updated in so long. I was grounded and then I had to copy ALL of my fics into another notebook 'cause my first one fell apart (Cover fell off. I can hide porn in it!) and then I just had the most horrible case of writer's block ever. It was awful. Honestly, you should see the first version of this chapter. It was ugly. Anyways, I'm back now... I wonder if anyone reads my notes. Pineapple. Microphone. It's an egg-less egg salad sandwich (courtesy of Ms. Sisti). What's my favorite color (Hint: Check my profile...)? I forgot what else I was supposed to write... OH YEAH! The song is "Apologize" by One Republic. But not the slow one. The faster one. Sounds like someone pressed fast forward. Or got the chipmunks to sing it. Seriously. Song really clicked, though. So cute.

Pairings: Grimmjow x Ulquiorra, Renji x Byakuya, Kira x Gin (one-sided), Soon to be Grimmjow x Ichigo

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. Boo

Warning: MxM, filthy language, cheating, lying, stealing... wait, no stealing, bad writing, typos, OOCness, rambling, violence if you're a wimp, suggestions of sex, boy kissing. Don't like, don't read.

'Thoughts'

-- Scene/Time change

_Song lyrics_

* * *

"Aw, come on, Grimm."

"No."

"Please?"

"No."

"_Pretty_ please?" Ichigo jutted out his lower lip.

"No! I do _not_ want to dance. Stop asking."

"But I love this song."

"Dance by yourself. Dance with one of your friends. Dance with a freaking hooker. I do not care, as long as you are not dancing with me."

"That's cold, man. Why wont you dance with me?"

Grimmjow sighed. "I don't dance."

"Sure ya do. It's not hard."

"Trust me. If I get on that dance floor, it will frighten small children."

"Luckily, small children are not allowed in clubs."

"I can't take the risk. Do you _want_ to be scarred for life?"

"You cannot possibly be that bad."

"How would you know?"

"Let's put it this way: Spring Fling last year, Yamamoto, Chad, Hanataro, and my father, 'Low.' I haven't been able to hear 'Apple bottom jeans' without gagging since."

"Okay, maybe I'm not _that_ bad, but—"  
"Then what is your problem?"

"My bo—_ex-_boyfriend is supposed to be here. If he sees me dancing with another guy, all hell will break loose."

"Hell pales in comparison to a detention with Kurotsuchi. Bring it on. What does your ex care if you dance?"

"Ulquiorra is not one to mess with..."

"Ulquiorra is your ex-boyfriend? I thought that he was with Aizen."

"He was. Hence the 'ex.'"

Ichigo's eyes widened. "Oh."

Grimmjow glanced around the bar. "Fuck it. He's not even here." He got off his stool and smirked. "Let's go conquer the club."

--

"WHAT?" Ulquiorra's roar barreled out of the bathroom, making everyone within a seven foot radius jump and look around, bewildered. "You're telling me that you two _ruined my relationship_ just to get each other?"

Gin swung his legs, sitting on the bathroom counter. "Uh, yeah, tha' sounds abou' righ', eh, Sousuke?"

"It's not like we did it on purpose."

"Oh, _I'm_ sorry. I didn't realize. That makes everything okay."

"Dun talk to 'im like that. It's not his fault."

"The hell it isn't! It's your fault, too!"

"So quick to point the finger at others, Ulquie. Maybe yer problem lies wi' yerself."

"How on Earth is this my fault?"

"Uh... Got what 'cha asked fer. I know ya went to Sousuke's house that day 'cause ya wanted him instead of Grimm. 'S yer own damn fault fer bein' so selfish."

The relentless pounding on the stall door ceased. The pale prisoner turned around and sunk to the floor. "It _is_ all my fault..."

Aizen pulled Gin towards him, mouth hovering inches away from his ear. "Don't you think that's a little harsh?"

Gin raised his eyebrows. "Bu' he was so rude to ya, Sousuke. I had ta teach him a lesson."

--

Ichigo pulled Grimmjow onto the dance floor. "Hurry up. You already argued through half of the song." He pushed past the club-goers until he found an opening big enough for two. He threw Grimmjow into the center and pressed his back against the other's chest.

Grimmjow placed his hands on the smaller boy's hips and leaned down to his ear. "S'not my fault. You just _had_ to dance with me."

"Shut up. You know you wanted to dance with me, too."

"Can't say that thought crossed my mind." Grimmjow straightened up, searching for the beat of the music.

_I loved you with a fire red, now it's turning blue.  
And you say sorry like the angel  
Heaven let me think was you.  
But I'm afraid._

Grimmjow and Ichigo relaxed, hips swaying in time with the song. The two were enjoying themselves until the latter spotted a certain familiar red head. Out of all the places, Renji had to pick the same club as Ichigo. As he watched the other boy cut through the crowd, he recognized another. 'Oh, look,' Ichigo thought. 'Byakuya's here, too. What a lovely reunion.' He turned around, wrapping his arms around Grimmjow's neck and pulling him close.

_It's too late to apologize; it's too late.  
I said it's too late to apologize; it's too late.  
It's too late to apologize; it's too late.  
I said it's too late to apologize; it's too late._

'_Hello_,' Grimmjow thought. 'Personal space much?' He complained inwardly but made no move to push Ichigo away. Nor did he do anything when the other boy kissed him. Hell, he even kissed the carrot top back. 'It's not like Ulquiorra gives a shit. He's cheating on me, for chrissakes,' he reasoned. 'He didn't even bother to show up tonight like he said he would. He's practically _asking_ me to leave him...'

_I'm holding on your rope.  
Got me ten feet off the ground._


	11. I Smell a Breakup pt 4

Author's Note: Hiya, dear reader. I forgot what I was going to put as my author's note, so I'm just going to whine about how Leesa wasn't at her computer to help me with the ending of this chapter. So it's not my fault that it sucks (Okay, maybe it is... Let me have my delusions.) It's Leesa's fault. Blame her for the sucky ending. It's all her fault! (Oh, and you guys didn't get to hear my whining about how there was no manga this week. Unless you read Ghastly. So... I'm distressed. Cause there was no manga this week. Someone shall die.) Oh, wait. I remember what I was going to ramble about! This chapter is almost pointless. Almost. But it's not. I swear. It was cute and fun to write. And I swear it had a purpose. It may look like it is unnecessary. But it isn't. Promise.

Pairings: Grimmjow x Ulquiorra, Renji x Byakuya, Kira x Gin (one-sided), Soon to be Grimmjow x Ichigo

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. Boo

Warning: MxM, filthy language, cheating, lying, stealing... wait, no stealing, bad writing, typos, OOCness, rambling, violence if you're a wimp, suggestions of sex, boy kissing. Don't like, don't read.

-- Scene/Time change

**-Text message**

* * *

Ichigo dragged himself back to the bar, followed closely by Grimmjow. They both climbed onto a stool and slumped over the counter.

Grimmjow spoke first. "I have never danced so much in my entire life."

"Ditto."

Grimmjow looked at Ichigo, an eyebrow raised. "Did you just say 'ditto'?"

"Yeah..."

"Dude, nobody says that anymore..."

"And?"

"You don't care how lame that is?"

"Not particularly."

"Man, I wish I could be like that."

"I don't see why you care about what other people think."

"When you're in with the popular crowd, you gotta watch your mouth and watch your back if you wanna stay that way."

"Mm-hm. And why would you want to stay that way?"

"The power. It's intoxicating."

"Big word for someone so high on the social ladder."

"Just 'cause I look like the big, dumb jock kind doesn't mean I am. I do not use my skull to store extra air."

"I never said that you did. It's just most of the 'cool' people _act_ like their head is hollow."

"Do I strike you as that type?"

Ichigo furrowed his eyebrows and stroked an invisible beard as he inspecting Grimmjow, making the other boy laugh. "No, actually, you don't."

"Thank you."

Ichigo grinned. "You look like the type that's naturally dumb."

Grimmjow fake-gasped. "How dare you tarnish my gleaming reputation with filth such as yourself! Retract that statement immediately!"

"Oh, I'm sorry. It looks like you're a better-than-thou."

"Only when I'm bored."

"Do you get bored often?"

"Yeah, actu— hey!"

"Oh, come on! I thought you were supposed to be smart. You walked _right_ into that one."

"You cheated!"

"All's fair in love and war."

Grimmjow leaned closer to Ichigo. "And which one is this?"

Ichigo smirked. "That all depends. Which one do you want it to be?"

--

Gin poked his head out of the bathroom door. "Oh, look! Ichi and Grimm are leavin' together. I think they're holdin' hands. How cute!"

Ulquiorra shot up straight, hitting his head on the door. "Ow, fuck!" He bit his thumb to distract him from the ache in his skull.

Gin shut the door and walked over to the stall in which Ulquiorra was being held captive. "Language, Ulquie. I was gonna let ya out, but wi' a mouth like tha', you shoul' be in her ferever."

Aizen shook his head. "Now, Gin. We can't leave him in here. Someone will find him, and we will obviously be blamed. If we let him out, no one will believe he was locked in here at all, especially not by us."

"Good thinkin', Sousuke." He stepped closer and set his prisoner free.

The minute he could get out of his cell, Ulquiorra lunged at Gin, pinning him to the wall. "You rotten scumbag! I'll make you pay for—"

Aizen grabbed a handful of the dark haired boy's t-shirt and flung him against a closed stall. He grabbed the thin wrists and held them to the door. "It seems you've forgotten you place, Ulquiorra. Making threats is so unbecoming on you." The smaller boy squirmed, trying to get away, but his futile attempts at freeing himself only made Aizen laugh. He tightened his grip, sneering. "I f you ever lay a hand on Gin again, I will have to hurt you. I wouldn't recommend crossing me again." Aizen relinquished Ulquiorra's wrists and the boy slid to the floor. "Remember that, Ulquiorra." He and Gin collected their things and exited the bathroom, Gin dropping a phone at Ulquiorra's feet on the way out.

Ulquiorra picked it up. "Six missed calls and one new text" was displayed on the screen. He pressed "Read." The message was from Grimmjow.

**-Um, Ulquiorra? I don't know how to say this...**


	12. Nobody Wants To See Us Together

Author's Note: Hiya, dear reader. Guess what? It's here. It's freaking finally here. My zune /and/ the new chapter. My zune came a few days ago (it broke in MARCH, for those of you who didn't read Various. I'd recommend that now.), but the chapter is here today! This is probably the last chapter.

Pairings: Renji x Byakuya, Kira x Gin (one-sided), Grimmjow x Ichigo, Gin x Aizen

Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach. Boo

Warning: MxM, filthy language, cheating, lying, stealing... wait, no stealing, bad writing, typos, OOCness, rambling, violence if you're a wimp, suggestions of sex, boy kissing. Don't like, don't read.

-- Scene/Time change

* * *

Ichigo opened his eyes and immediately regretted doing so. He sat up and looked at the boy whom he was sharing a bed with. A bed that was not his, he noticed. His eyes widened as the teal haired boy stirred.

"Are you awake?"

"Uh... We didn't... did we...?"

Grimmjow shook his head. "We walked in the door, and when I came back from the bathroom, you were passed out on my bed."

Ichigo sighed. "What time is it?"

"Uh..." Grimmjow reached over to his phone, which was on his nightstand table. "Four o'clock."

"Holy crap!" Ichigo jumped out of the bed and frantically started pulling clothes on. "I'm really sorry, Grimm, but I have to get home. My dad is going to _flip_. I didn't tell him that I wasn't gonna come home." He slipped his feet into his converse without bothering to tie them.

Grimmjow propped himself up on his elbow. "Uh... Ichigo..."

"I have to go before he starts crying to the poster of my mom." Ichigo dashed out of the room, calling out behind him. "I'll call you!"

Grimmjow flopped back onto his bed. "Well, at least now I'll definitely see him again."

--

Ichigo opened the door and evaded a kick from his father. "Karin! Yuzu! I'm home!"

His two sisters ran up to him, Yuzu giving him a hug, and Karin standing off to the side with her arms crossed. When the former finally detached herself from him, she began to scold him. "Onii-chan! You know better than to stay out all night without calling! We were so worried about you!"

Isshin, picking himself off the floor, joined in. "My son, Yuzu is right! Daddy was so worried about you! My only son, my wonderful son!" He leaned in towards Ichigo and added, "Were you out with the girls? I know how you kids get during mating season."

Karin rolled her eyes as Ichigo decked their father. "I keep telling you, you old man! It's called puberty!" She walked over to Ichigo. "I'm glad you're home, Ichi-nii." She paused, an eyebrow raised. "Is that the same shirt you left with?"

Ichigo looked down at the t-shirt he had hastily thrown on earlier. His sister was right. It was the shirt Grimmjow was wearing the night before. He blushed. "Well, you see... Uh, it's not exactly the _same_ shirt, but... it's, uh..."

"So whose shirt is it?"

"It's my, uh, friend's. Yeah. He's a friend from school."

"Like Renji was a 'friend' from school?"

Ichigo's eyes widened. "Wha— No, not exactly..."

"Mm-hm. I hope this friend doesn't run off with a teacher, too." Karin turned and began walking towards her room.

Ichigo watched his sister and wondered when, exactly, did she come to know everything about his personal life.

--

"Hey, Dad, I'm going out!" Ichigo opened the door and came face to face with the very person he wanted to see. "Uh, hey Grimm. Perfect timing. Have something to give you." Ichigo shut the door behind him and handed the shirt to Grimmjow. "You could've told me that this wasn't mine."

"I tried. You were in such a hurry to get out the damn door that I couldn't get two words in." Grimmjow took the shirt and started to walk away.

"Hey! Where are you going?"

The teal haired boy turned around. "Well, I figured you wanted to leave so badly because a: you were going to get in trouble or b: you wanted to get rid of me. Since you only said, 'I have something to give you,' it sounded a lot like, 'Take this and go.' So I'm going."

"Aw, c'mon, Grimm." Ichigo walked up to Grimmjow and pulled him into a hug. "The last thing on my mind was getting rid of you. You're prolly the best thing that's ever happened to me."

Grimmjow smiled. "Well then, how's about we go to my place, since we never got around to doing anything last night?"


End file.
